7-2 Win: Domingo was GREAT and the bats were on FIRE

Wooooo. Winning is fun.

It’s even more fun when you beat up on another top team in the league. I’ll be honest, I have been pretty damn surprised that the Mariners have 46-27 record this season. DID NOT see that coming.

I hadn’t been that shocked since Chris’s girlfriend was revealed to be in on the whole thing in Get Out. Amazing move by the way…

And if I just spoiled it for you – what the fuck? It’s been out for over a year now. Not my fault…


(But not really sorry)

Anyways, I wasn’t fazed by this Mariners hype at all. And clearly, Domingo Germán was not fazed either. Because he was AWESOME.

Well to be fair, he was slightly shaky at first, but nothing too bad. Remember, he’s basically Tanaka in the first inning.

Domingo gave up a leadoff double and then an error by Didi and a fielder’s choice gave the Mariners a 1-0 lead. So it wasn’t even an earned run. After this minor fielding slip-up, Domingo was a MONSTER. He was throwing absolute filth.

For the next 6 innings, he only allowed one baserunner – and that is technically not even true. The only hit or walk that the Mariners got off Domingo, from innings 2 to 7, was a solo home run by Nelson Cruz. Other than that one mistake, Domingo was DEALING.

They couldn’t touch him.


Thanks, MC Hammer.

His final stat line was:

7 IP, 2 hits, 1 ER, 9 K’s. NINE. LET’S GOO. And a 2 hitter along with it!

Let’s wrap up this pitching discussion before we switch to our unbelievable juggernaut offense.

After Domingo’s day was done (great alliteration right there), AJ Cole took over…AJ Cole where the hell have you been?

Pretty sure the last time we saw you LeBron James was on the Miami Heat. And Kevin Durant wasn’t being called a snake. And nobody knew who Cardi B was.

Okay, not thattt long, but it has been a hot minute. His last appearance was on May 28th vs. Houston, if you were curious…

Well, in his grand return he pitched 2 shutout innings with 0 hits and 3 K’s. Welcome back, AJ! I honestly do not know when we’ll see you next, but it’s nice to have you there just in case.

See you in July! Or maybe August. Who knows?

Now, let’s switch to our BATS.



Down by 1 in the first, The Terminator, himself, mashed a 426 foot BOMB. This man/machine/cyborg/former Marlin is finally starting to see pitches better. Watch out, everyone…here he comes.

The game was knotted at 1 for what felt like an eternity. The Seattle starter, Marco Gonzalez, was pitching a pretty solid game of his own.

Until he walked Greg in the 6th and Miggy Andújar strided to the plate…



For a guy who had been slumping as of late (0 for 12 with 5 strikeouts in last 3 games), this was a MASSIVE knock for our stud third baseman. And it gave us a 3-1 lead, to make things even better.

Like a fortune cookie after a delicious Chinese meal. So much better. 

The runs continued to pour in as HICKSY crushed a 413 foot homer of his own, after a single by Clint “Please Don’t Send Him Back Down Again” Frazier/



This was actually the third straight game where this man has hit a dinger. Much like Miggy, Hicks has been in a slump. The haters and naysayers have been calling for Boonie to make a change with Hicks.

With Clint waiting in the wings, Aaron felt the fire lit under his ass. Since then, he has come out and DELIVERED. Proud of you Hicksy, keep it up.

Now we had a 5-1 lead as Domingo continued in cruise control.

I mentioned the solo shot by Nelson Cruz cut the lead to 5-2, but Aaron “Of course it was him” Judge had a nice RBI single to extend the lead back to 4…what a guy, what a guy.

To top everything off, we got to see the phenom do his thing. You know who I’m talking bout.

The kid who is UNREALLLLL.

This guy.


Gleyber you are absolute lunatic. You are a stud. And yes, you are very much unreal.

446 feet. Holy fuckin shit.

As I tweeted over and over last night. I LOVE THIS TEAM.

Game 2 against Seattle starts pretty soon.

Johnny Lasagna on the bump…let’s get another win!


Follow me on Twitter @JohnFerraro_

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